Identity crisis

Today I got mistaken for a Canadian by a Canadian because of my accent. WTF? I guess I've been picking it up, and my co-workers in Washington have been noticing it too. Why can't I ever get something sexy-sounding, like a French accent? No offence to Canadians, Cincinnatians or Michiganders, but I feel like I've gotten the shaft in terms of sounding cool. On the other hand, I've learned over the years that it's not necessarily a bad thing to sound like a native when you're in a foreign country, so I guess it's pretty practical for my situation. Sigh...

Drive at Your Own Risk

The crime rate in Vancouver is in general pretty low for a major world city; however, the greater Vancouver area is one of the world's capitals for auto theft. In fact, the nearby town of Surrey is considered the "car theft capital of North America." Therefore, you are planning on visiting Vancouver or the surrounding areas and driving a rental car while you're here, be sure your doors are locked and windows are closed (not even vented) and that you leave no valuables in the car, even if they're out of sight. Do not do the popular Michigan thing of leaving your car running while you go into a gas station or whatever, even if you're only away from it for 2 seconds and it is still in view. These people are ruthless, and I have an aquantience who recently fell victum to their evil ways.

Jeff just told me a story about this guy who was charged with around 70 counts of auto theft. In spite of this, he still drove a stolen car to his court hearing and got caught again. Apparently, most of the stolen cars are used just for a single trip. The thief pilfers the car, drives from point A to point B, and then abandons it. Once he/she wants to go somewhere else, they steal another car, and the cycle starts again--steal, drive, abandon; steal, drive, abandon. Jeff said this is largely due to the crappy public transportation system in Vancouver. Going from point A to point B in a car is considerably quicker than going the same distance in a bus. A lot of big cities have this problem, but it is especially bad in Vancouver.

Luckily, in an effort to reduce auto theft in the Vancouver area, a "Bait Car" program was launched by the Integrated Municipal Provincial Auto Crime Team (IMPACT) in 2002. The program actually originated in Minneopolis in the mid-90's, and it continues to be one of the most successful auto theft prevention programs in the world. The Vancouver program has been extremely successful as well, reducing car theft by 71% since 2002. 71%!

The "Bait Cars" are kind of used like an undercover cop who dresses up like a prostitute to attract solicitors and then arrests them. GPS tracking, microphones and video cameras are installed in the car as well as a remote control system that is used to disable the engine. Once the thief drives away, the police are alerted immediately. They then disable the engine and lock the doors, trapping the thief inside. Police usually leave the car in an unattended parking lot, with the doors unlocked and with valuables visible. Sometimes they even leave the keys in the ignition to make things easier for the thief.

I originally intended this blog to just be a warning and not some sort of research article, but I came across this information when researching auto theft rates in Vancouver and thought it was interesting. Anyways, it's nice to know that progress is being made in the Vancouver area to prevent auto theft, but you should still take great care to secure your car while visiting.

Immigration Update

We were just sent the final bill to complete the processing of my immigration application, which we promptly paid online the same day, so my permanent residency card could come any day now! Hurray! It's been almost 5 months since they received the initial application, so hopefully we'll stay within the average processing time frame of 6-8 months.

Although it will be awesome to finally be granted permanent residency, the actual process doesn't end there. In the last few weeks, I've been working with my Dad to arrange to have my stuff moved from his house in Michigan to a storage facility in Washington State. Why Washington State, you ask? Well, once I am given my permanent residency status, I don't actually become a permanent resident until I go over the border into the US and then go back over the border into Canada, where I will then officially "land" as a permanent resident. At this "landing," Canada gives me the opportunity to bring my possessions (import them) over the border "gratis," meaning I don't have to pay any duties on any of them, including my car. Jeff and I did some rough math, and we estimated that it would have cost around $1,500 in duties just to import my car alone, so we're probably saving a bunch of money on the whole deal thanks to this opportunity. Anyways, we are moving my junk to a storage facility in Washington so that it will be ready to move when I'm allowed to make my final "landing."

Although I don't have to pay any duties on it, importing my car is a whole other process on it's own, and there are still other costs involved. In short, I have to get documentation from GM listing the model's "recall history" and then have the car inspected to see if it conforms with Canadian vehicle safety and environmental standards. If it does not, I have to get the car modified so that it will be in conformance. I know right now that I will probably have to get my speedometer relabeled so that the bigger numbers are in KM instead of miles. I'm not sure if the odometer itself needs to be converted to KM, but I'm assuming so as the mileage is directly tied to the car's value, and there should probably not be any ambiguities in that area.

Even though this crap will probably be a huge pain in the ass, I am so happy to have this process almost over. Going through the border every day is becoming less and less difficult as the officers remember me more and more, but I still come across an occasional skeptic every now and then who gives me a hard and usually stressful time about letting me back in to Canada. The Americans are generally easy to please, and for the last month I had been getting through even without a passport as I had to get it renewed (I used a notarized copy of the first page in addition to every other ID, certificate, etc. that I possess).

In addition to the obvious benefit of being allowed to live with Jeff in Canada forever, sometimes I am pleasantly overwhelmed by the absolute uniqueness of this experience. Living in a foreign country has its own degree of uniqueness and often sizable difficulty, but living in and immigrating to a foreign country is a whole other thing. I'm actually really thankful to be able to experience it. I'm sure the process in obtaining dual citizenship will be even more interesting three years from now (especially due to the fact that I have to pledge allegiance to the Queen of England, something that I never imagined I'd ever do and will feel really weird about), and I am very excited to someday be able to call myself an American Canadian or Canadian American, depending on how you look at it.

"Green" taxis

I don't think this is solely a Canadian thing, but the other day Jeff and I passed a cab that was a Toyota Prius!


I couldn't believe it! Jeff said that they're quite common these days. Cool eh?

(FYI: I didn't take the picture above, but it appears as though it's in Vancouver due to the area code.)

WTF Washington?!

I've decided to change the name of my Washington posts simply for the reason that the title above is way funnier than "Washington Weirdness," and I aim to entertain. Anyways, the subject of today's post concerns my impression that WA hasn't entirely left the 1960's. Evidence to support this claim includes:

1. Washington has a "bug" problem.

It's amazing the things you notice while driving. No, I'm not talking about a large quantity of bugs that splatter across my windshield; rather, the large quantity of "Love Bugs" I pass on my way to and from work. I am amazed at the number of people who possess Volkswagen Beetles. They're everywhere! And a lot of them are decked out with racing stripes (a tribute to "Herby" I'm guessing), daisies, bubbles, and God knows what else. Volkswagen has made a mint off these people.


I swear to God: one day I tried to count all the Beetles I saw that day, and the number was between 10-15 (I lost count after awhile due to my great audio book). It's just crazy.

2. The prevalence of 60's attire and paraphernalia.

I don't interact with a ton of folks outside of work, but from what I've seen, retro attire is still pretty popular, and people decorate their possessions with daisies, peace signs, and other symbols of the late 60's. Take this mailbox for example:


I pass by this mailbox everyday, and the first time I saw it, I almost sprayed Diet Coke all over my dashboard. I told Jeff about it later, and he said it must be kind of funny when the people who live there give someone directions to their house: "Just look for the mailbox with the butterfly and peace sign. You can't miss it!"

Not all or even most of Washingtonians (try pronouncing that correctly) dress or decorate this way, but I've seen it more here than in the Midwest.

3. Popularity of organically-grown food.

This probably doesn't have anything to do with the 60's, but I think it has the same sort of "aura" nonetheless. A few weeks ago I asked a colleague about this place called "Trader Joe's" that appeared to be a grocery store, but I wasn't exactly sure. She said my suspicions were correct, so I headed over there during my lunch hour in search of some much-needed deodorant.


Come to find out, the store actually sells almost all organic food. Now, I'm used to seeing an aisle or two dedicated to organic/health/environmentally-friendly items at the grocery store, but this entire store is there for that purpose, and it was huge!


People were buying entire cart-fulls of the stuff, which I found completely unusual as I don't know many (if any) people who buy almost all organic. The store was super busy too and has prime real estate, right smack dab in the middle of a mid-size strip mall on a major Bellingham street. As usual, my curiosity kicked in enough to ask a store employee what this place's story was. As I was paying for my organic chicken caesar wrap and organic pomegranate blueberry juice (there was no Diet Coke to be found), I asked the cashier "What the heck?" He told me that the store is based out of California and is quite the big thing there. Not recognizing many brand names, I asked if all the food was locally-grown, but apparently that's something they're still working towards. He also said that the store itself is built with the environment in mind, having limited but tasteful decor and energy efficient lighting. They are also trying to sell more fresh produce and less pre-packaged items since they want to create less waste with packaging, something the cashier said was very important to him. Anyways, this guy was all about the Trader Joe's, and even though there were like 4 people behind me in line, he went on and on about how great it was, and eventually I moved further and further towards the door in an effort to make him stop talking and pay attention to those poor people behind me in line.

Oh yeah, in case you were wondering--I never did get my deodorant. They didn't have many health and beauty products except stuff like toilet paper made from recycled paper that came from paper produced from organically-grown trees.


All and all, Washington consists of some pretty interesting people. When chatting with some co-workers, I eventually realized that for once I am working in a state that's truly "blue," and not a state that could go red at any minute (MI), a state that goes red because their voting system is flawed (OH), or a state that's so red that it turned color about an hour and a half before any other state changed color at all in the last election (KY; I got some angry texts after that one..."Gail, Kentucky just went RED!" as if it was my fault or something). I can't really draw a clear connection between this and WA being stuck in the 60's, but I guess their liberal attitude is still pretty prevalent as it was back then, and that is wonderfully refreshing. Washington: I like you--even though you're weird.

Gail's Guide for Customs Survival

Having now crossed the US-Canada border 54 times, I'm starting to learn what to do and what not to do when crossing. This may not be so interesting or useful for most people, so, if you are one of those people, feel free to stop reading anytime--I'll understand. But for me and those like me, these methods become a source of survival in terms of saving time and, most importantly, sanity. So, here are Gail's Tips for US-Canadian Customs Survival.

1. Think about what you're going to say to the official(s) before you approach them. If you're stuttering and searching for explanations, they'll get suspicious and ask you even more questions that you'll have an even harder time explaining. Also, they can be kind of intimidating at times, and this may make explaining things a bit more difficult if you're not well prepared.

2. Make sure your passport and whatever other documents that will facilitate your entry are ready when you approach the booth. This past June, the US started requiring a passport of everyone crossing the border, now required for ground in addition to air. Canada, however, does not have this requirement for ground travel, although a passport is probably preferred over any other form of picture ID.

If you're like me and have an unusual reason to enter and stay in the country, be sure to bring any other documents that will substantiate the legitimacy of your reasons. For example, since I'm still going through the immigration process, I bring all the correspondence I have received from the department of immigration to prove and show the status of my application. I've found that without this, the Canadian officers are more hesitant to let me in without a "fight," as I only have visitor status in the country and shouldn't be residing there as thus unless actively immigrating, which I am. I don't wait for them to ask me for this documentation; I just stick the most recent correspondence in my passport and hand them the whole thing. I also bring along a copy of our marriage certificate just in case the officers don't believe my claim of being married to a Canadian. I've never felt the need to show this nor have I ever been asked for it, but I have it in the event of an emergency.

3. Put your car in park. Officers will frequently go around it to look in your back seat and at your license plate, and if they desire to do so, they'll tell you to do this anyway for their own safety. Plus, you don't want to accidentally let off the brake and make them think you're making a run for it. A few officers may tell you to shut off the car altogether, although this has only happened to me a couple of times and is a matter of preference and not a rule.

4. Take off your sunglasses. I've never been able to get through without doing this, even when dealing with officers who now recognize me.

5. Think about what you're bringing in before you attempt to cross. It's not that you're not allowed to take any stuff you bought in one country into the other country, but there are rules limiting the transport of certain alcohol, tobacco, and agricultural products, as well as some high-value merchandise.

One day I was asked if I had any agricultural products on board. I peer down at the passenger seat and look at the banana that I had brought to eat along the way. I think, "oh crap" and say softly "Uh, a banana...?" I secretly prepare myself to throw it into the parking lot behind me in the direction of Canada. Luckily, before I hurl the forbidden fruit back into its country of origin, the officer says "A banana is OK." Whew! I had totally forgotten that you're not supposed to bring stuff like that over the border. While driving, I got to wondering: if a banana is OK, what isn't OK? A kiwi? A potato? 100 potatoes? A bonsai tree? Pig tongue? Well, according to the US Department of National Security website, all plant and animal products (including my banana) are supposed to be declared, inspected for "pests," and approved before going over the border. The guy apparently let me off easy.

Even though I've never had to pay duties on anything I've brought into either country, I've heard if this happening. In fact, Jeff was made to pay duties on a pack of cigarettes upon returning to Canada from the US. This is just dumb, but they have a right to do it, so beware.

6. Tell the truth. Even if you're entering the country for a reason that you may think will sound a bit shady, it's better to tell them the shady reason for entry than to look even shadier if and when they find out that you lied. You have to remember that your talking to the country's Department of National Security and not just a toll booth operator (not to discount the value of toll booth operators, but they're only going to deny you entry if you can't pay the toll or threaten their lives). Governments are taking issues of national security rather seriously these days, so you don't want to mess with it. I'm not sure what information they record when you talk to the officials (if any), but lying to a customs officer may bar your future attempt into the country as well.

7. Do what you're told. Unless it sounds unethical, do whatever the officials tell you to do without causing any trouble. There's been one instance when I was told by a Canadian official to park under the canopy where they tear apart vehicles and go inside so I could get my vehicle inspected. I have no idea why this particular officer (whom I'd never seen before) felt that I needed my car inspected as I told him the same stuff I've told the other officials everyday, but I did what I was told without question, even though it made absolutely no sense.

I go into the customs office and wait in like for 15 minutes, during which I witnessed a group of people get denied entry, which I think was a good reality check to remind me that this does happen and that I need to keep my shit together when crossing the border. I'm not sure why these "No Entries" (as the officials called them) weren't allowed in, but I wasn't about to ask in fear of becoming a "No Entry" as well.

Anyways, once I get up to the counter, I simply explain to the officer my usual speech, that I live in Abbotsford with my Canadian husband, am going through the immigration process and come through here every weekday as I work in Bellingham. The officer briefly glances at my passport and simply says, "OK, good-bye." and my car was never inspected. If this happens again, I'm probably not going to resist the officer by saying that this has already happened and the officer in the office didn't feel the need to inspect my car as I don't want it to appear as though I have something to hide. The officer in the booth recorded everything I said on a form and instructed me to give it to the official indoors, so maybe next time, if I resist the inspection, that officer WILL feel the need to inspect my car. I obviously have nothing to hide anyway, so I'll continue to humor them by complying to their insensible requests, even though they're a big waste of my time and completely unnecessary.

8. I'm not really sure how to list this as a "tip", but the first question I'm always asked is "Where do you live?" I not only give them the answer to this question, but I also go on to say, without stopping, that I live with my Canadian husband, am going through the immigration process, and work in Bellingham. For awhile I thought that you shouldn't say anything other than the questions you're asked in fear of saying something that will lead to an inspection or whatever, but I know they're going to ask this anyway, and it takes a lot longer for them to piece these facts together with a series of questions, so I just tell them so they get a quick, cohesive explanation. This isn't to say that you should jabber on forever, but I think it's better just to give them the essentials upfront and then let them go from there.

Upon beginning this entry 2 weeks ago on my Blackberry, I never thought I would have so much to say about this seemingly-simple experience of going through customs. Evidently, I do. Even though it's really annoying to have to do twice a day everyday, I think it's pretty unique. How many people spend everyday in two different countries? Sometime this year Jeff and I hope to move to White Rock, a beautiful town right on the Pacific. From there it will only be a half hour drive for me, and I'll be able to go through a border crossing with a Nexus lane (the crossing I take doesn't have one), making this process waaaaaaaaay easier as I can just drive right through without dealing with anyone. But until then, I will continue to cross according to the rules above and hope for the best.

Washington Weirdness

Although the State of Washington is obviously not in Canada, the only reason I am going there is because I live but can't work in Canada; therefore, I think it's ok to include stuff about it in this blog (I blame Canada for deflecting attention from itself).

Anyways, it probably be more fitting to call this new segment of my blog "Washington Uniqueness," but that doesn't sound nearly as good as "Weirdness," so there ya go. Driving almost 60 miles round trip through WA everyday gives me plenty of time to discover unique differences between it and the states in the Midwest in which I have worked and resided. I wasn't expecting to find anything in WA unique enough to write about, but I was pleasantly surprised at my following discoveries:

#1: Infestation of drive thru-only coffee houses

On my 27 mile-long commute through Northern Washington farmland, I pass what I deem a ridiculous number of drive thru coffee houses. If I stray from my usual route, I discover even more. Washingtonians love their coffee, and they love it fast. This really isn't surprising though since Starbucks is based in Seattle, a mere 2 hours south of here. I ironically don't pass any Starbucks stores--mostly rinky-dink little shack places in the middle of nowhere like this:

Maybe I live in a bubble, but I have never seen a drive thru-only coffee place like this in the Midwest, ever. There is no shortage of them in the big city of Bellingham either:

The majority of these places, even the ones in the middle of nowhere, are open 24 hours, apparently supporting the truckers and third-shifters of WA. Anyways, this drive thru coffee phenomenon isn't super bizarre by any means, but I just thought it was fun and unique.

#2: Fred Meijer-Fred Meyer Parallel Universe

A week ago I asked one of my coworkers if there was anywhere near the office that I could get a money order. He listed off a couple of places, including "Fred Meyer." I was like, "You guys have Meijer here?!?!" close to having a heart attack. He said no, it's different. I couldn't believe it, so at the stroke of 11:30 I drove over there, hoping to see the familiar red and blue Meijer sign. Instead I got this:

Doh! WTF?! I go inside, and "Fred Meyer" is the same type of department/grocery store that Meijer is, just a bit more ghetto. I was slightly disappointed, but maybe our beloved "Meijer" stores will make it out here someday and blow the impostor "Meyer" out of the Pacific.

Cell phone madness

Is it less expensive to:

A) Call a Canadian cell phone that's being used in the US with a US cell phone that's being used in the US;
B) Call a Canadian cell phone that's being used in the US with a Canadian cell phone that's being used in the US;
C) Call a Canadian cell phone that's being used in the US with a US cell phone that's being used in Canada; or
D) Call a Canadian cell phone that's being used in the US with a Canadian cell phone that's being used in Canada?

Anyone who can come up with the correct answer wins a touque!

Not chasing butterflies

I recently obtained a marketing manager position at a small IT company in Bellingham, Washington. Although Bellingham is only about 27 miles away from Abbotsford, it takes me about an hour to drive there, mainly due to driving on all back roads, some of which have speed limits of only 25-35 MPH.

Before I go any further, I would just like to clarify that I feel immensely lucky to have been able to obtain a job right now, especially one in my field that didn't require a whole lot of effort to get. I'm only typing this in order to explain and record the experience and not to complain about it. Don't get me wrong---I'm often frustrated, stressed and tired doing this everyday, but it is a small price to pay to live with Jeff and have a job at the same time.

Anyways, since I drive over the US-Canada border to get to work, I obviously have to go through customs everyday. Getting into the US has understandably never been a problem, and in fact, the guys (I've not yet encountered any women customs officials on the US side) are beginning to recognize me and even remember why I'm entering the US. I am sort of becoming a "regular," and all the guy asked me when I went through yesterday was "Are you bringing any foreign merchandise with you?" and then just let me through, which is pretty unusual.

Unfortunately for me, going through the Canadian side after work isn't so smooth and can be downright unpleasant. I've ironically never yet gotten the same official twice, which I expect would make things somewhat easier since they'd probably start recognizing me and stop hesitating to let me through. No such luck yet, however. I've found that driving over the border is less strict customswise than flying, but there have been a few instances when I've had to truly defend my intentions for entering the country, which can be quite stressful.

Now, let's first think about what it must be like to go through customs for a hypothetical American family (I'll call them the Joneses) consisting of a mom, dad and two kids, who are entering Canada for recreational purposes:

"Howdy" says Mr. Jones to the customs officer as he hands her his family's passports. Officer Deville smiles and replies "Hi! Where are you lovely folks headed on this beautiful day?"

"We're going to the park for a picnic!" answers little Jane Jones happily.

"How wonderful!" exclaims Officer Deville. "Did you bring some yummy cookies and cake to eat on your picnic?"

"Yeah!" shouts little John Jones from his car seat. "We have apple pie too!"

"Wow! Will you chase butterflies and blow bubbles while you're at the park? I always loved doing that when I was a kid," says Officer Deville.

"Yeah!" yell both children back in unison. Officer Deville smiles and hands back the passports to Mr. Jones. "Have a super day!"

As the Jones family drives away, Deville turns the light from red to green and I approach the window. I say "Hi there." as I hand her my passport. Deville ignores my greeting and begins to scrutinize every page of my passport.

"Where do you live?" she asks in a monotone voice while turning the pages.

"Abbotsford," I reply.

"Where's your visa?" The tone of her voice changes from complacent to suspicious.

"I'm married to a Canadian and going through the immigration process. We sent in the application--"

"Where's your plate registered?" she interrupts before I can explain anything further. As she squints at the monitor that's displaying the back of my car, I tell her Kentucky.

"Why?!" she hostilely demands. Her facial expression becomes that of what I can best describe as a skeptical snob.

"Because I can't register it in BC until I am a permanent resident," I explain. Isn't she aware of the laws she's attempting to enforce?

"Have you sent in your application?" she asks. Didn't I already tell her this? I think to myself. I tell her yes. She looks doubtful.

"You sent in the fingerprints and everything?" like she's making sure I did my homework. I say yes again as she turns back to my passport. Apparently she notices the stamps from when I crossed the border at the airport twice in June and she asks, "What did you tell them at the airport?"

"Er..exactly what I just told you...?" What else would I tell them? I wonder to myself. I have no other reason! Isn't the fact that I'm entering to go live with my husband reason enough!?!?

Deville apparently could not come up with anymore interrogative questions to ask me, nor could she find any good reason to keep me out of Canada. She starts asking me the routine questions at a rapid pace: "Did you buy anything while in the US? Are you bringing in any tobacco or alcohol?" etc. She finally hands me back my passport and says "go ahead" in the same monotone voice with which she began.

I speed away, thanking God that I got through that. I'm all worked up and stressed for the rest of the night (but it was nothing that beer couldn't cure).

Now, the hypothetical story about the Joneses is, of course, a huge exaggeration mainly for satirical purposes; however, what I went through was exactly how it went down (although the name "Deville" was made up. Officers only have a 6 digit number on their uniforms instead of a name tag). To be fair, I have to mention that Deville's attitude and questioning style are the exception to the rule. Many US and Canadian officers, although not usually overly friendly, are not cruel or hostile either. The majority act very respectfully and professionally, and they do their job. Some even break a smile if I tell them something like "Yeah, I can't resist that Canadian charm!" referring to Jeff's charm, of course (hehe).

I imagine it would be much easier and less stressful to enter both countries if my reason for entering was to go chase butterflies or something else fun but meaningless. However, my reason, although not easy to explain to the customs folks, is better. In fact, it is the best reason I think anyone who has entered Canada has ever had. Sure, there must have been thousands who have fought their way into Canada to be with their loved ones, but I fight my way in to be with Jeff, and that is the best reason ever. And if anyone else tries to fight their way through customs to be with Jeff, they'll have to fight their way through me too, and I'll kick their ass. ;)

Discovering Canadian Oddities: An Ongoing Occurrence

Canadian Oddity #6: Naked Bike Ride

This particular oddity isn't exclusive to Canada, but it takes place in a lot of major Canadian cities, and Vancouver is no exception. Apparently hundreds of cyclists strip down to their birthday suits and ride around the city to protest oil dependency. Last weekend, Vancouver cyclists were also protesting the fact that there aren't enough bike paths in the city. The true oddity is that although the bikers in the buff block traffic and pretty much reduce it to a standstill (not to mention commit indecent exposure), the mounties are instructed not to anything as the department doesn't want to deal with it. I'm all about cyclists' rights, the right to protest and things of that nature, but if people are riding around naked in the streets stopping traffic, shouldn't the police try to at least facilitate it so it doesn't shut down the city?

Discovering Canadian Oddities: An Ongoing Occurrence

Canadian Oddity #5: Provincial Independence Days

Each Canadian province has it's own sort of "independence day" in which they celebrate when the province was formed. Monday happened to be BC Day, and most folks (including Jeff) had the day off. Can you imagine there being a New Jersey Day, a Michigan Day, a Texas Day, etc.?

Immigration Secrets Revealed!

I've kind of been at a loss of what to write the past few weeks, but today it dawned on me that I'm totally forgetting probably one of the most noteworthy and unique experiences I'll have in this country: immigration. Jeff and I have been dealing with this process for so long now that it just seems like a normal part of our lives, hence my neglect of addressing this issue earlier. I get a lot of questions about it from family and friends, and over time I've noticed that there are a couple major misconceptions in regards to what we're actually doing, what rights I do and do not have in this country at this moment, and what my status and rights in the country will be once the process has been completed. In this post I thought I'd address the popular misconceptions regarding immigration and explain more of what the process involves in a later entry.

Misconception #1: Once my application to immigrate has been approved, I will be a Canadian citizen.

No. The road to citizenship is significantly longer than the road I'm now traveling. Right now I'm trying to achieve permanent residency, which gives me the right to stay in the country indefinitely, the right to live anywhere I want within Canada, the right to legally work and study in Canada, and the right to receive publicly-funded health care. I currently have none of these rights. To put it in American terms: I'm trying to get a green card and have to go through another process later in order to obtain dual citizenship. I cannot even start this process, however, until I have lived here as a permanent resident for at least 3 years. Thus, the belief that one can automatically apply for citizenship upon entering a foreign country is false.

Misconception #2: Now that I'm married to a Canadian, I have the right to live and work in Canada.

Have you ever seen the movie "Sicko" where an American marries a Canadian just so she can receive free health care? There are many who try to manipulate the system, so getting married to a Canadian gives me nothing from Canada under the law. The country obviously recognizes the marriage as legal, but nothing more. This may come to a surprise to some people, but Canadian custom officials have every right not to let me or anyone else who is not a permanent resident or citizen into the country if they don't want to. I doubt this would ever happen, but the fact remains that just because I'm married to a Canuck doesn't mean I have any legal right to enter or stay in Canuckland. In fact, Tulip has more right to be here than I do, and she's just a silly cat.

So why did we get married? Well first: we love each other; and second: we could not even submit the immigration application until we could submit our marriage certificate along with it. There are a variety of ways that one can immigrate to Canada (more on that later), but being sponsored under the "family class" was the only one for which I could be eligible at the time, and I wasn't even eligible for that until we got married.

Anyways, if my entry into the country were to ever be refused (heaven forbid), Jeff and I would have absolutely no legal footing upon which to stand in order to counter this refusal. In order to help ensure my smooth entry into the country, in addition to my passport, I always bring a copy of our marriage certificate with me so that if worse comes to worst, I can at least show that my claims to being married to a Canadian are true. I also bring the letter from immigration confirming the receipt of our application and the approval of the sponsorship portion. I carry my passport with me everywhere just in case the mounties might feel the need to detain me if they suspect something amiss. Again, the chances of this happening are slim, but I believe one needs to be prepared for anything when traveling or living in any foreign land.

When I went through customs last month, after questioning me for about an hour in this big scary room where they go through people's luggage, the officers gave me what's called a "visitor record," which gives me a visitor number that any customs official can look up and see all the times I've been over the border and why. It also puts a deadline on the amount of time I can spend in Canada with "visitor" status, which seems to make the customs folks more at ease when deciding to let me in. I've driven over the border twice since then with no problems or confusion, unlike before. At the end of the deadline (which I currently the end of December) I can apply for an extension on my visitor status if need be.

Again, I never expect this to happen (knock on wood), but you can never be too careful. Being kept apart from Jeff would be absolutely devastating to us both. I'd also be homeless, which sounds incredibly unappealing.

So those are the major misconceptions regarding immigration that I've been experiencing. I'm sure many more questions will be answered in my later entry on the process itself.

Discovering Canadian Oddities: An Ongoing Occurrence

Canadian Oddity #4:

You'd think someone called a "Peace Officer" would be a person in charge of making sure protests don't become violent, taming rioters, etc.; however, the purpose of Canada's "Peace Officer" is to randomly pull over commerical vehicles on the freeway to make sure they comply with safety and environmental regulations. So I guess, in a roundabout way, they are keeping the peace by attempting to prevent future accidents and global destruction. This is probably a better use of their time--Canadians only riot during hockey season anyway.

Going Beyond the Eh

Having now lived in Canada for a few months, I have been able to detect some differences in the way Canadians speak versus the way Americans speak, both in the words we use as well as pronunciation. Many Americans chuckle at the Canadians' use of the interjection "Eh?" but the differences in the way Americans and Canadians speak go well beyond that simple two letter word. The following collection of words and phrases are perhaps not all uniquely Canadian, but commonly used by many English-speaking Canadians in their everyday speech.

Brown bread - Bread that Americans would commonly refer to as "whole wheat" bread.

Buggy - A word used by Canadians in a grocery store to signify a shopping cart. 

Canuck - It may sound derogatory, but the use of the word "Canuck" to refer to a Canadian is perfectly acceptable. The NHL hockey team in Vancouver is called the "Vancouver Canucks," and Canuck was the last name of a popular comic book character, "Johnny Canuck."

Expiry date - The Canadian equivalent of the American use of the phrase "expiration date."

First Nations - A term referring to the aboriginal peoples of Canada, used by Canadians as the term "Native American" is used in the United States.

Flat - A 24-pack of beer that is also frequently called a "two-four" by Canadians.

Garbuator - Even though it may sound funny to Americans, Canadians use "garbuator" when talking about a garbage disposal.

Hey? - Canadians say this in place of the phrases "What?" "Huh?" or "Pardon me?" when one has not adequately heard what another person has said.

Hydro - As some Canadian provinces use hydroelectric power as their primary source of generating electricity, many Canadians use this word to refer to their electric service: "Honey, did you forget to pay the hydro bill again?"

Loonie - Canadians call their one-dollar coin a "loonie," which stems from the picture of a loon on the coin's back.

Mum - Americans have often heard the use of this address by British folks, but many Canadians also use this word when referring to their beloved "Mom."

Packing - Used not only when packing something, such as a suitcase, but also when carrying something: "I'm sick of packing this heavy suitcase everywhere!"

Parkade - The Canadian equivalent of the term "parking garage."

Runners - Canadians are not talking about marathon participants when using this word, but rather the running shoes the participants are wearing.

Tap - Canadians say "tap" in the place of the word "faucet."

Touque - A hat that many Americans would refer to as a "ski hat" or "cap." A "touque" often has a pompom on its top.

Toonie - The nickname of the Canadian two-dollar coin, named as thus simply because it rhymes with "loonie" and starts with the same letter as the word "two."

Washroom - A word used in place of the American use of the word "restroom;" however, Canadians still call a private bathroom a "bathroom" as Americans do.

As the Canadianisms above go well beyond the stereotypical use of the word "Eh?," Canada, the Canadian people and Canadian culture all go well beyond the stereotypes "cold," "polite," and "invisible," respectively. People are often blinded by one word that describes a culture and thereby miss out on the many characteristics that make that culture unique. Language is the window to any way of life, and discovering the distinctive qualities of that language also allows for uncovering the true qualities of a small piece of humanity.

Discovering Canadian Oddities: An Ongoing Occurrence

Canadian Oddity #3:

Canadian post offices are actually privately-owned franchises run by non-governmental employees. The government still owns and regulates the Canada Post; however, privately-owned entities still receive a major share of the profits. Isn't it interesting that this major Canadian institution is less-socialized than its US equivalent?

I discovered this oddity while shopping at Zellers, the Canadian version of K-Mart. The post office was actually in the department store, just like a hair salon or a bank! How weird is that?

Provincial Elections in Canada

I was able to witness the British Columbia provincial election on Tuesday. Jeff took me with him when he went to vote, and it was interesting but not very exciting, probably because the polling location was dead, and there was not much hype preceding or succeeding the election. This particular voting location was at a church, and the signs outside the door looked like this: 

These are not my pictures, by the way; I was too scared to take pictures in fear of being mistaken for an American anarchist or something. Anyways, the area wasn't plastered with flags like you usually see at polling places in the US, just with these signs. We walk into the church, and there are about 10 tables set up in rows in a small gym with 2 people at each table. The table to which you are assigned depends on the first letter of your last name. You go to your assigned table, show your ID, get two ballots, and vote right at that same table behind a small cardboard partition. 

Once again, this is not my picture, but a picture I found on cbc.ca; however, Jeff's polling place looked almost exactly like this. You don't have to wait in one long line to show someone your ID and then wait in another line to cast your vote, as often happens in the US. The large space in which people were voting (the gym) was quite a bit more comfortable than the small hallway of the elementary school in Kentucky in which I voted last November. I waited in line for over an hour to vote at one of the two voting machines, one of which wasn't functioning properly (I was able to vote at the other one, thank god). Here there are as many places to register and vote as there are tables, and there are plenty of volunteers to facilitate this process.

Jeff was handed 2 paper ballots (electronic voting is apparently only done at a municipal level here in Canada at this time) with only one item to vote upon on each: which party they want as the majority in Parliament (which appoints the Premier, who is the Canadian equivalent of a US state governor), and whether or not they want a proposal (called a referendum) to pass. I wasn't able to see Jeff's ballots, but I found an image of the referendum ballot on another website:

Voters simply put an X in the circle next to the electoral system they want, and that's it. The other ballot operates the same way, just with a list of the parties' names with the same big white circles by them. You're only voting for one party, so you don't have to do research on a bunch of candidates you've never heard of who are running for other offices you really don't care about (or feel guilty about just voting straight ticket, an option that doesn't exist in Canada). 

Apparently the "liberals" won the most seats in the provincial Parliament in this election, but apparently being "liberal" and "conservative" means something different in Canada, a subject about which I will write later once I've learned more about it. The result of the referendum vote is still inconclusive as the ballots are still being counted.

Speaking of political parties, there are some pretty interesting parties here in BC. A few weeks ago, Jeff and I were stopped at a light in downtown Abbotsford, and I noticed the following sign:

The sign reads "Your Mom Called Da Kine. She Said to Bring Home a $20 Bag." I stared at this sign for a good 30 seconds before realizing what it meant. I turned to Jeff and said, "Is that what I think it is?!" Da Kine is apparently the name of a pot shop that supports candidates of the BC Marijuana Party, and is located right smack dab in the middle of downtown Abbotsford:

Possession of marijuana is not legal in Canada; however, the BC Marijuana Party is more powerful here than I would have ever expected, or maybe it just appears that way. The party first started participating in BC elections in 2001, but was excluded from the debates even though it had more candidates running in that election than the Green Party or the Unity Party, both of which were allowed to participate. In that election the Marijuana Party achieved 3.22% of the popular vote. According to some, the party would be a lot more powerful if they campaigned for more than that one issue.

There is also the Sex Party, which advocates for more acceptance of sex education, indecent exposure, and prostitution. In this past election, the party received 684 of the 1.5 million votes cast in the general election. According to their website, the party's goal is not to get their candidates elected, only to push their political agenda. 

I really don't have any sort of insightful conclusion with which to end this post, simply because I don't know enough about the topic to act as an authority. I can't say whether Canada's voting process is better or worse than the US's as their government's structure and electoral process appears to be quite different. I admit that I've been having a hard time wrapping my head around this system of government, but I will continue to do more research and reading as I did for some of the items presented in this entry. Despite the research, this post is probably riddled with inaccuracies, so please do not use it as a reference when writing a doctoral dissertation as you may regret it later.

Discovering Canadian Oddities: An Ongoing Occurrence

Canadian Oddity #2:

In Canada, marriage licenses can be obtained at your local credit union. That's what I call convenient!

Le Français est impressionnant! (French is awesome!)

I started learning French using the Rosetta Stone computer program the other day, and I really like it! I feel like I've learned so much already; no wonder the program costs like $500 (about $250 per level if you buy them separately). Luckily, Jeff already owned the first two levels, so those will keep me busy for awhile.

The program uses "total immersion" teaching tactics, which means it doesn't translate or explain anything in English; you have to figure out what things mean by using the French and pictures alone. At first I was kind of skeptical about this as I've always thought it's better to learn a bunch of vocabulary and grammar before you actually start putting the words together, but I feel like I'm learning so much faster this way without seeing any conjugation charts or grammar rules. There are times when I really want to ask a question about such things, but as I go along, I usually tend to figure it out myself.

Being already able to speak German fluently and having so much prior exposure to Spanish is definitely an advantage when learning French this way as I already understand the concept of words having genders, adjective endings depending on gender, different forms of "you," etc. There are also a lot of French words that are similar to or the same as German and Spanish words, many of which are just pronounced somewhat differently.

My biggest challenge though is reading the words with silent letters. Based on what I've learned, a very large percentage of French words have letters at the end that are silent. Also, French combines a lot of words together in the form of contractions, but they are unlike the contractions we have in English, so it's a bit hard to get used to.

The program has voice recognition capability, so when it says something in the language and you repeat it (or try to), it can tell if you said it right or not, and will make you repeat it until you get it right (or give up). It's like having a native French speaker all to yourself.

The cool thing about learning French here is that it is an official language of Canada, and there are many people here who actually speak it as their native language with whom I could practice. Before coming here, I didn't realize that 23% of the Canadian population, about 7 million people, speak French fluently! Going to Montreal or anywhere else in Québec and being able to speak it there would be particularly chock full of awesome.

Additionally, it also helps that the text on the majority of product packages and signage throughout Canada is written in both French and English. I've learned a few words just by reading that (i.e. Pâte de Biscuits = cookie dough).

Through this two official languages phenomenon and several other factors, I'm beginning to recognize that Canadian culture isn't only similar to the US, but primarily a combination of US and European culture with original Canadian characteristics mixed in. You add stuff from plethora of other immigrants in there and that makes things even more interesting. Perhaps Canada is the best of all worlds. Of course there are problems where the cultures clash or whatever, but overall I am finding the immense amount of multiculturalism amazing.

Discovering Canadian Oddities: An Ongoing Occurrence

Canadian Oddity #1:

3.25% fat milk -- When 3.5% is too much, but 3% just isn't enough...

Mixed bag

The fastest trip to the doctor I ever had was yesterday. Walked in, told them what I wanted, paid $50, waited 2 minutes, met with the doctor, walked out. I think the whole ordeal probably took about 10 minutes, 15 max, and I had never even been there before. Where was the long line they speak of when criticizing Canada's health care system? I can remember numerous times when I've had to wait FOREVER in that little examining room in the doctor's office just to see a general prac. If you don't bring a book with you, you're screwed. You'll be staring at a cheaply-painted wall or reading charts of the circulatory system over and over for an hour. And $50 is what I would have paid in the US as a co-pay with my previous insurance at a similar establishment for the same service. I have travel insurance right now, which only covers medical emergencies and lost luggage, not routine doctor's visits. So $50 for someone without health insurance to get quality medical treatment without having to go to an ER. Hmmm...

Granted, this is the only experience I've personally had with the Canadian health care system, so it may be an exception to the norm. Also, many Canadians complain about their system, especially the wait times to see a specialist, but I feel like we in the US often have to wait just as long, if not longer. Also, did you know that Americans pay more for health care per capita than Canadians do? Sure, Canadians get taxed a lot for almost everything, but they are getting what they pay for, live longer than we do, and have significantly less poverty and crime. It sounds like a utopia in comparison. If Americans pay more on average and get less care and benefit, what does that tell you? It's crap! Crap crap crap!

The bottom line is this: all Canadians have access to health care that they can afford. Heath care is a right, not a privilege like it is in the US. Everyone has a right to live a healthy life.

I will now step off my universal health insurance-loving soap box before staying on it all day. The US health care system makes me so angry sometimes that I would love to throw my computer out the window, and this is one of those times, especially because I see how good other countries have it in comparison with ours and it makes me mad. On to less irritating topics...

Wanna see our new kitty?


We (well, I) named her Tulip, pretty much just because it's a funny name as well as original. Have you ever heard of a cat named Tulip? We got her on Easter day too, so that sort of makes sense as it's a Spring type thing. It took her a couple days to get used to her new territory, but she's pretty well acclimated now I think. We adopted her from a very well-run branch of the humane society, so well run that I might even start volunteering there, I was so impressed. Everything was so clean and organized, it was incredible, and they treat the cats like hotel guests. Some of them have medical issues, so they do what they can to accommodate those, even if it includes buying really expensive food or rushing them to a vet on a Sunday.

We first tried to adopt a cat at the local Pets Mart and submitted an application for one, but they never called us back. They wanted to do a home inspection and everything, which I feel is kinda unnecessary. You would think they'd want to find homes for these poor cats, but no. I'm really happy with the cat we got though. She's quite well behaved and very friendly, not to mention cute. She looks like a teddy bear when she's sleeping. Awww...

Back to Canada. I don't know the specifics of the entire process, but I've learned that in order to obtain a driver's license in Canada (as a teenager, not an adult that has just landed in Canada or whatever), one must adhere a series of decals to ones car before receiving a full-fledged driver's license. In BC (and probably the other provinces), when driving on a learner's permit, one must adhere a letter "L" sticker to the back of their car for a year. They must then take a test to advance to next level, which is the "Novice Permit," with which comes a "N" decal to put on the back of their car, which looks like this:


Sorry, but I couldn't help that their car was dirty. Apparently they don't teach proper automobile hygiene in Canadian driver's training. Anyway, they have to have this "scarlet letter" on their car for a minimum of 2 years before they no longer have to be branded. If they get even just one infraction on their driving record, however, they could have to start the entire 2 year program over from the start. Sounds brutal. You have to pay for this torture as well as schools don't provide it for free or a small fee. When Jeff got his (I won't mention how long ago), it cost $500, and one can only assume it has gone up in price. I wonder if this sort of system results in fewer car accidents and traffic violations...?

An expatriate of hope

Even though I've lived in foreign countries before, I've never realized how much being an American means to me as I have while living in Canada. I believe this is because I've never before been seriously presented with the idea of giving up my nationality for a completely different one. I decided long ago, before ever dreaming of moving to Canada, that this is something I would never ever do. Being an American is an important part of my identity, part of the essence of my entire being, and calling myself a German, Austrian, Canadian, etc. would, to me, be just like calling myself male instead of female.

This post is not meant to be an ethnocentric pro-American essay; it is rather a testimony of how proud I am to be a representative of the country in which I was born. Sure, I tend to criticize many aspects of American government and society on a regular basis, but this does not mean I hate my country or the people whom have been elected to lead it. This regular questioning and criticism does not come from a place of disdain, but a place of caring for all Americans and a place of love for the ideals for which our country represents (or tries to).

The world watches us like a hawk. The Canadian media is flooded with American news, film, television and music. The German and Austrian media is quite similar, however slightly more removed. These countries tend to pay more attention to our country than they do their own. I've discovered that some Canadians don't even know the name of their own Prime Minister, and yet they not only know the name of our President, but they know enough about him in order to generate educated opinions of him and the way he runs our country. This does not mean that Canadians are dumb, ignorant or do not care about their country; it means that the US has such a great influence over the world that non-Americans intertwine American society, culture and government with their own in a tremendous way.

Not only are we being closely watched by the world, but we are looked up to by many as a symbol of hope and leadership. If the US fails the world in representing these characteristics, it generates feelings of fear which sometimes lead to feelings of hate. Some Americans might perceive these feelings of hate as envy, but I really don't think that is usually the case. When I was in Austria in 2004, I saw an issue of profil (which is the Austrian equivalent of der Spiegel) with the headline "Die wichtigste Wahl" (The Most Important Election) and a ginormous picture of President Bush and Senator John Kerry on the cover. For Europeans (Austrians, at least) to view our election as the "most important" election in the world, that really says something. I don't think some Americans realize the extent to which the decisions that are made by the US government or the impressions of American culture that the media portrays affect the entire world. So when other countries disagree with our foreign policy decisions or whatever else, we tend to get an attitude of "If you're not with us, you're against us." These countries are with us and part of us whether we or they like it or not, so when we fail to listen to their opinions, and we give them names like "Old Europe," we are diminishing our integrity as a democracy, a virtue for which I think Americans are most proud.

The United States has done so much to help the world as well as done so much to hurt the world, even at times with the best of intentions. The fact that we have such a great impact, both positive and negative, means we must continue to carry that responsibility in the best way we know how. Our government leaders are not the only ones who are responsible for this, but all Americans, especially expatriates who might be the only exposure one might have to an American that does not involve a TV.

I love my country so much that I would be willing to give up the rights that Canadian citizenship would give me if it meant keeping my identity as an American. Luckily, it doesn't look like I'll have to. Dual citizenship is legal in both the US and Canada, so I'll probably go that route, even though it entails pledging allegiance to the Queen, which will be pretty weird. I have nothing against the Queen, but I really do not identify with her as I do my country of origin. I just hope, as an American discovering Canada, that I represent my country to the best of my ability by personifying the ideals for which we stand and thereby giving whomever I meet a sense of hope.

A high-priced basket

I have one word to describe alcohol regulation in Canada: bizarre. I hear that it's a bit less bizarre now than it was 20 years ago, but nonetheless, it's quite different than how alcohol sales are regulated in the US. You can't just go into any gas station or grocery store and buy booze; you have to go to designated publicly or privately-owned liquor store or cold beer and wine store and get it there. Private establishments have to purchase the alcohol from the Liquor Control Board, run by the Canadian government. Thus, the government has absolute power to set the price of alcohol, and, needless to say, these prices are astronomical in comparison with US prices. For example, one can buy a 6-pack of Bud Light in Kentucky for $5.49 (very precise, I know), whereas a 6-pack of Bud Light in British Columbia is $11.99. Since Canada brews its Bud locally, you can't even blame the high price on the beer being an import. So yes, as an avid Bud Light connoisseur, I'm screwed.

Going into a government-owned liquor store is quite the experience. Jeff and I went into one the other day, and it was HUGE! One can get just about anything. Just in case you want to try a lot of different things, this particular store had these cute little grocery basket-carts so that you don't feel like you're buying a lot of booze even though you may be. Genius.


As you can see, the high-priced booze didn't deter us from buying. I'm sure we're not alone. I've been told that the government controls alcohol sales for the mere fact that, by doing so, it generates ginormous revenues. That's it. No sort of safety-like "stop binge drinking or drunk driving" type of excuse. It's all about the money. At least they're honest.

Something a Bit Less Profound

I am a reality show freak, so I was extremely heartbroken when I discovered I couldn't watch them on the websites of the major US networks while in Canada (I have sense discovered other sites on which I can watch them, but most are not of the greatest quality). Anyways, in order to satisfy my uncontrollable addiction, I discovered that many reality shows broadcasted in the US have a Canadian equivalent, including Canada's Next Top Model, Project Runway Canada, Canadian Idol, So You Think You Can Dance Canada, and I'm sure many more that I have not yet discovered. Their websites do not discriminate against the origin of my computer in terms of allowing me to watch them, for which I am very grateful (yet another way that Canadians encourage diversity in their country).

Upon doing some quick research, I have only come across two reality shows that originated in Canada: Family Christmas, which shows a real-life family celebrating Christmas (sounds kinda lame, doesn't it?), and Pioneer Quest, which shows 4 people living a pioneer life for an entire year, which could be kinda cool. I haven't watched either one, nor do I even know if they are still on the air (any Canadians out there who wish to enlighten me?).

Back to the shows aired (not necessarily created) in the US that have Canadian versions: the Canadian versions are almost exact replicas of the US versions; even the lines they use are mostly the same. For example, for you Project Runway fans: Heidi Klum is replaced by the legendary supermodel Iman, who is a brilliant fashion icon and AIDS activist, but the show is entirely the same except for one line in which Iman says "[Designer's Name Here], you just don't measure up" in place of what Heidi says when someone is eliminated on the original show, which is: "[Designer's Name Here], you're out." No offence to Iman or the show, but this measure up line is corny as hell and annoys the crap out of me. I'm not sure if it's because the entire show, except for this one line, is the same, and this pathetic attempt at giving the show an unique identity is completely lame, or if it's just the fact that the sentence is lame in its own right. To give the show some credit though, I found some of their challenges to be extremely unique and often much more challenging than many I've seen on the original show.

Canada's Next Top Model is also in the exact same format: challenge in the beginning, photo shoot, evaluation by 4 judges, and then the handing-out of photos to the contestants who are still in the running to be Canada's Next Top Model. From what I've seen, there is nothing about the show that makes it unique to Canada.

Upon these disappointing discoveries, I began to wonder if the unoriginality of these reality shows is exclusively Canadian or if replica shows of other countries are just as unoriginal. Dancing with the Stars did not originate in the US but in Great Britain, where it is called "Strictly Come Dancing." I found a clip of the show on YouTube and noticed that the US version is almost exactly the same in terms of the set, show format, judging (although there are 4 judges instead of 3), music, etc. as the original British version. They even have 2 of the same judges. So, apparently Americans are as unimaginative as the Canadians in terms of their reality show reproduction.

I suppose this replication would make sense as these shows are franchises. However, aren't most franchises allowed to have some variation depending on the market in which they serve? I'm pretty sure that most people do not care about this as much as I do, if at all, but since I'm all about discovering cultural differences, no matter how insignificant, it would be nice to see a show, even though it might be a franchise of a show created in another country, make a honest effort to give their show a culturally-specific identity. You would think they would want to as the US versions of these shows are broadcasted on the major Canadian networks during Canadian prime time TV. We in Canada actually get these shows twice in one night as they are aired at the same time as they are in the Eastern timezone as well as during the prime time of the timezone in which we reside.

A question to end this useless critique: does the mere fact that the contestants are from Canada (or from whatever reality show-replicating country) make the show appealing enough to warrant another version, even when shows from different countries can be as easily viewed? I suppose so if they get good ratings and profitable advertising sales; however, I feel as though these replica reality shows are just another small way that countries are losing their precious cultural singularity.

The Point of Canada

Jeff and I drove all the way from Cincinnati to Abbotsford, British Columbia in my 2007 Chevy Aveo. The trip took about 5 days with a short break to visit my peeps in Michigan. We drove up through the UP and crossed into Canada at Sault Ste Marie. I had been quite nervous about crossing the border for awhile as they ask you how long you plan to stay in Canada, what you're doing there, etc., and as I was entering Canada as a "visitor" (legally), I thought they might get suspicious if we answered "forever" and "living there" to the 2 previous questions, and even though we did give them those answers, they seemed more concerned with what Jeff was doing in the US for the past 4 days than what I'll be doing in Canada indefinitely. We expected them to search our car full of crap, but they let us go without any issues.

Ontario is just like northern Michigan in terms of its terrain: beautiful hills covered in evergreen trees. This was not so unusual to me, although I never expected Ontario to be such a bloody long province. Once we entered Manitoba, however, that's when things got weird. The landscape became incredibly flat and the freeway was extremely straight for miles and miles, so straight that once we did finally reach a curve, it felt unnatural and was somewhat difficult to execute.




Seeing pancake-flat terrain with very few trees and buildings for hundreds of miles is not for the mentally unstable, let me tell you. For a couple of days of driving 12-13 hours on the flatness, we both got extremely giddy towards the end of the day. It became somewhat frustrating for me, so frustrating that I eventually turned to Jeff and asked, "What is the point of Canada?!" to which he answered, quite deservedly, "Screw you!" In my mind at the time, after seeing hundreds of miles of nothingness, a fair-sized portion of the country that looked almost completely uninhabited, I kept asking myself why this country even exists. There's nobody here! A little while after we entered the Canadian Rockies, however, I started to get the point.


In drastic contrast to the the flatness of Manitoba, Saskatchewan and Alberta, British Columbia is extremely mountainous. Once we entered the mountains, we never left them. Up and down we went for hours, going around curves so sharp and massive that if you went an inch too far left or too far right, you would ensure your untimely demise (ok, so it's not that dangerous. Not even close. That line just popped into my head and I had to put it in here.) It was so gorgeous, especially when the sun was setting.


Some may not agree, but I really think this area of mountains, although not as big, is comparable with the beauty of the Alps.


The point (or maybe one of the many points) of Canada is this: diversity. The different extremes in terrain lead to a wealth of diverse economic opportunities: mining, agriculture, logging, tourism, etc. This diversity, however, only begins with the landscape. From what I've been reading, Canada encourages immigration (unlike the US), and by doing so gets some of the best and brightest foreign skilled workers and college students that the world has to offer. The United States isn't the only "melting pot" nation in the world, and quite frankly, Canada might be a bit better at it as it continues to use this diversity to its advantage.

Did you know that only 10% of the residents of Vancouver are actually from Vancouver? I could not believe the number of Asians I saw there. I was also surprised to see some Middle Eastern and Asian men wearing turbans in public. I can't remember the last time I've seen anyone wearing a turban in the US, and I think it's sad. There is also a ginormous Chinatown in Vancouver, in which the street signs are even in Chinese. I get the feeling that this area is not only to attract tourists, but to also serve the local Asian population in a big way. And I'm just skimming the surface with these observations. I can't wait to discover what else in this country is chock full of awesome.

Ok, back to the trip. There were some occurrences of random weirdness along the way.


While driving through the mountainy part of Alberta, we saw a sign that read "Head-Smashed-In Buffalo Jump." Jeff told me that the Indians (they call them First Nations People in Canada, which I find kind of awkward to say but much more fitting than the use of "Native American" in the US) would herd buffalo off of a cliff so they would save time and ammo not having to kill them individually with weapons (WTF moment). That's what I call efficiency, and whoever is responsible for marketing that place is a genius.

Also, there was also this random dude in the middle of nowhere pulling a funky-looking cart behind him, like one of those carts you'd see in China.


He might have just been backpacking across Canada and decided to bring a bit more than a backpack with him.

I was also pleased to see recycle bins sporadically placed along the highway, even in the middle of nowhere!


If the Canadian federal and/or provincial governments (not sure who funds what here) can provide a free recycling service in the middle of no man's land, then why can't the US provide one in an ordinary town with peeps in it?

The weather during the trip was actually a lot better than we thought it was going to be, but we did have to drive about 200 miles in "blizzardous" conditions.


It was so windy man, I thought my Aveo was going to get blown off the road.

Here are a few more pictures of things that don't need any sort of commentary, they are so beautiful:





Sorry for the poor quality; all the pictures we took were through a dirty windshield while the car was moving. We didn't want to take the time to stop as we had so far to go.

After about 45 hours of driving and over 10 tanks of gas, we finally arrived in Abbotsford on Friday night. We had been going up and down in altitude for so long that once I stepped out of the car, I felt extremely dizzy and nauseous, like I had been drinking for hours. We were so glad to be home though.

**To my Canadian readers, if any: I realize that many of my opinions here could possibly be quite ignorant, maybe to the point of being completely false. Please remember that I have been in Canada less than 2 weeks and still have a lot to learn, considering I knew very little about Canada before coming to live here. Just know that I possess an extremely open mind and that I will eventually get it right (hopefully). Thank you for your continued patience and understanding.**